out of the mouths of babes...

I really need to go through my video's so I have the video with the story - but John has been teaching jadon to ride a bike - with no training wheels - well the other night they were out working on it again and John came in and called me out there - jadon was holding up his bike and going to show me how he can get on it and going on his own... this part was hard to master.  His bike fell over and I was just waiting for him to throw himself down in frustration and want to quite. (jadon is such a perfectionist and has such high standards for himself.  if he does not attain them the can really crumble!)  anyway - I was worried that "crumble" was coming and IT DIDN'T.  He just shouted "it's okay mom..." as he picked his bike back up "It's just harder with out my dad by my side" ...

I almost BURST into tears. and of course john almost did too as he said "now.. that'll preach!"  and how right he was.  Jadon is constantly teaching me.  - jadon really was born to change the world.  He is a true leader.  I love being his mom and I can't imagine what he will do one day.  or what he will do just next year as he storms into public school!

And of course I must share jack's "out of the mouths of babe's" story....

today we were playing down at Zara's house - just one of the awesome neighbor's on our street. zara's mom and dad have 3 kiddos as well - zara and jadon are 2 months apart and have played since they were 1!  anyway, today they had the pool out, the picnic table, the sand box - the whole neighborhood was having a ball - about 8 kiddos in all.  and zara's mom had one of those air purifier/fans outside that look like a tall skinny cylinder with a grate over the front where the air comes out and control buttons on top.  (wow long story - but it will be worth it)

so today, in the middle of playing, jack walks up to it and starts to spout out his favorite mcDonalds order... then when no one spoke back :)  he says "hey.. we're hungry!"

this kid loves life  -  most everyday he impresses me with his amazing balance of strong willed and sensitive - but in everything he does his desire is to find JOY!  I love it.

and kyle for today - i think this pic tells all - between the pool, the pizza, the cupcake, the nap, the bike ride, and the favorite of the day - the sand box.....

Not sure if you can tell but the belly of his shirt and his feet are solid sand and he is sopping wet.  best of all - his shirt says "get a jump start of life"!  haha!  boy does that fit him!  the most significant think that came out of kyle's mouth today?..... sand, a bouncy ball, a leaf, pool water....

picture update...

Ann marie - these are for you!  and everyone else can enjoy them too...

Jadon and two of his best buds graduating from kindergarten.  Don't they look like little high schoolers!  I just can't believe how old he is getting.

You know when the house gets too quiet and you wonder what "they" are up to?  This is where I found kyle.  This is the boys art table in the play room.  A coveted area by kyle b/c he is not yet allowed free reign over the marker or crayon bucket!  So this is where I found him the other morning!

Jack - being a dragon at the pool.  If you look closely ...his goggles are upside down.  I LOVE IT!  Every night I make up a story for jack before he goes to bed and it is always about a dragon named jack and his adventures.  Jack always says "mommy, i'm not a jack dragon I'm a jack jack".  He also makes me pray for no monster, aliens or emergencies every night before he falls asleep!  too funny.  he gets the emergency thing b/c when jack shared a room with jadon I would say before I left and closed the door, "no getting out of bed" and Jadon - mr. prepared... would say - "what if I'm worried about monsters or there is an emergency".  So now jack thinks emergencies are the creatures that can come in his room at night!  IMAGINATION is jack's middle name!

This is Kyle getting his first hair cut.  He was so excited about the sucker that he kept opening his mouth wide to get more.  Not realizing that you had to close your mouth down to really taste it.  He finally got the hang of it!  and if you can see jack in the back ground - you will notice that he is wearing orange and has whiskers drawn in marker on his face.  He wanted to be a tiger that day....

Kyle and Daddy after a breathing treatment.

Kyle on the phone during a breathing treatment.  These were about 2 weeks of breathing treatments every 4 hours and then every 6 hours after being in the hospital with a collapsed lung and a bit of pneumonia.  He is all better now.

Jadon in the middle of his graduation performance!   One of the directors wrote a poem about each of the kids - jadon's talk about him being their leader... after it was over you could see jadon whispering down the line "bow... guys... bow... take a bow... it's over...."  too cute!  what a leader!

This picture just makes me smile - it gives me hope - not hope that kyle will be okay - kyle is so much more than okay - but just hope - the kind that moves us forward to tomorrow and then some - hope that allows us to pray, to care to worship, to love to teach... HOPE - and I pray that one day b/c of this picture in my mind I will pass hope to others.  These three boys, beautiful and perfect, amazing - love them so much!  (uh... and if you didn't notice - jack picked his clothes - a button up white shirt like jadon, and jean shorts rolled up 3 times.... nice.)

hope

i realized last night .... the questions was posed - how do you see God. one said - I bet you see him as a healer - b/c of what he has done in your life.

you would think so wouldn't you. I stewed on that really puzzled at why that was not my thought 18 months after my child who they said would not live - lived. and he is not just living - it is abundant. he is LIVING. so I thought who is he - and my reaction to my thought was. (I hate to even type it, but it is true). he is a betrayer. He has betrayed me. WHAT? WHY? HOW COULD I THINK THAT?

still stuck in my formula didn't work. somewhere along the way - I figured God out. No really - I did. (that's a joke) but I thought I had. my formula for fixing people, things, gaining blessing, living happy. Just rules for life. being a good wife, good mom, good friend, good godly person.

for some reason God decided to unveil this dirty horrific broken hurting desperate world to my eyes - all through a group of little babies and their hurt grieving wandering desperate parents. and i was one of them.

how did this happen. and how did I end up stuck with no formula - no God and so focus on this world and all the pain i had been missing - excuse me - ignoring - for 33 years.

some one suggested last night that yes - I may feeling like i am shouting my hopes up to the sky - no matter where I am shouting them - without God ... there is not even a hope of them being heard. then I realized maybe the big deal is not defining exactly who god is before I can trust him - maybe the big deal is that with out him there is no hope. none.

it is like my focus is just off. maybe the point is not how it all comes out but that he is there. he is there through all of it. he is with us. he promises not to leave us. maybe this is the point.

I am living in a shock that people hurt -all over, everywhere there are people bearing hurt that I could never fathom or live through. how will they live, how will they breathe, how will it all be okay? it is an overwhelming question to my heart.

Hope. could that be the answer? b/c he is there we have hope?