Day 6-- John

Day 6…
We began our day hanging out with Jadon and Jack, doing a few things around the house ,… trying to find some sense of “this is how life is going to be for now…” I find myself being overwhelmed at just how we take for granted the health or wellbeing of our kids. These last few days have made me realize just how thankful I am to God for my wife and boys.

Part of me really wants to just give the update… just give the prayer requests, but the other part of me feels like I need a place at the end of the day to vent, to say how I really feel, even if it sometimes looks faithless,… even if it sometimes seems defeated, at the risk of my religious glass house looking cracked for some out there… but the truth of the matter is right now,
I am scared to death. I am scared to trust this peace that I feel in my chest. I am scared to choose to believe that God is doing an amazing thing in our midst ,… I am just terrified that all who speak doom on Kyle’s wellbeing based upon statistics and numbers will eventually swallow me up whole.
So, therefore, I find myself constantly talking with God. Constantly remembering His word,… constantly having to CHOOSE to believe in the report of the Lord, placing hope and trust in Him, and being encouraged by those who continue to read, write, call, text, pray, leave voicemails, visit, give, share, cook, clean, love, play with my boys, etc. etc etc and so much more.

I hear most every call. I read most every text. I read your prayers and encouraging words every night,… it helps me breathe and get focused for the next day of battle.

Today, was a good day at the NICU with Kyle. A good day. Another day where we saw God flex His muscle, and Kyle respond in kind.

I love how when God moves and people respond,… it is just a beautiful thing.
I am praying that we are seeing the signs of Kyle’s medicine working.
Right now, we are tackling PDA which is not Public Display of Affection for all our camp 220 peeps.
It is a valve that should close at birth ,… normal 40 week delivery…
Kyle is 23 weeks, so … well, we have to figure out a way to get that valve closed. This valve is from the heart to the lungs that allows bloodflow.
It needs to close so that too much blood does not flow into the lungs, causing respiratory distress. Early afternoon ,we began to see signs of Kyle’s respiratory being easier. His blood pressure was good, His map was good (average of the top and bottom numbers of the BP) His Blood sugar and CO2 were good…
And finally, he was moved down from 60 breaths per minute to 55.
O2 was still at 35%, but the breaths per minute was decreased! Great, …
This means we are working in the positive trying to stay away from that other ventilator, and hoping to see his lungs grow and improve!
By late in the day, he was still trucking after another dose of the meds…
When we left tonight, … he was still consistent, and they had moved his breaths per minute down to 45. I am really praying that this is a good trend that can keep up. With no applause from medical staff, it is hard to know if and when we have crossed a milestone with Kyle. Anything that looks good is always quickly followed by a warning.

I continue to pray that Kyle’s PDA is closed,
His respiration is good, and getting better
His lungs develop at a rapid pace to a healthy place
His brain be protected from IVH or brain bleeds.
His kidneys to work properly.

Now, I am looking ahead, which we aren’t suppose to do in NICU world,
But I am…
I am beginning to pray for his digestive system to be ready to go for food.
I am praying against infections that can really set him back.
I am praying against a disease called NEC.
I am simply praying God will continue to favor Kyle and give him life and breath and that he will be healthy and safe.

I want Kyle to become a mighty mouthpiece for the glory of the all powerful, supernatural God. What more of a testimony than Kyle telling his story one day to a room full of students, or even crisis pregnancy centers, etc…
How amazing to be able to share to churches who may be sterile to the power of God and the movement of the Holy Spirit, how God saved him, healed him, gave him life when science claimed he had no chance, and when abortion lobbyists would claim he was only a fetus and not a real baby???
I believe and want this for Kyle. I want to grow old listening to Him proclaim the power of Jesus and speak life into people…

The cool thing is, I get something out of all of God’s glory too…

Kyle.


I pray Jesus that YOU would let this be.